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Dick Cheney Arrested

Disgraced former Vice President Dick Cheney was arrested Christmas Eve while trying to discretely reenter the United States to spend the holiday with his daughters—Liz and Mary–at the latter’s home in Virginia, said a Judge Advocate General’s Corps representative speaking under terms of anonymity.


As Real Raw News reported previously, the 9/11 mastermind had on 11 November fled the U.S. for New Zealand after discovering, apparently, that he, like his former boss George W. Bush, was the target of a military arrest warrant. Bush was apprehended that night, but Cheney had a sophisticated escape and evasion plan that aided his getaway.

“JAG and OMC received actionable intelligence that Cheney was returning to the U.S. aboard an unscheduled and undeclared CIA Boeing 777-200 headed to Miami. When the intel came in, he’d already been in the air for some time, and the flight was scheduled to touch down sometime around 4:00 p.m., Christmas Eve. He was already halfway here, so we had only hours to get in motion,” our source said.


Without disclosing specific operational details, he said plainclothes U.S. Special Forces had staked out the airport in advance of Cheney’s arrival. At a quarter past four, spotters with binoculars saw the unmistakable profile of the twin-engine, widebody on final approach. It landed on Runway 9 but did not taxi to either of the airport’s international terminals, as is customary for flights arriving from overseas; instead, the plane taxied to and came to a stop outside a maintenance hanger north of the terminals. The engines spooled down, and a pushback tug towed mobile ramp stairs alongside the jumbo jet. When the door opened, only one person deplaned. It was Richard Bruce Cheney.


Cheney immediately entered a black limousine with diplomatic license plates that had pulled up near the ramp stairs only seconds after he had left the plane.

“Special Forces had two choices: Take him there or tail the vehicle. They didn’t want to create a scene and chose to follow the limo,” our source said.


In civilian vehicles the SF team shadowed the limo several miles from the airport to an underground parking garage at the Hilton Miami Airport Blue Lagoon Hotel, ostensibly where Cheney planned to stay the night or switch vehicles to avoid potential pursuers.

Special Forces blocked the limo, trapping it motionless between their innocuous-looking Range Rovers, and then surrounded it with weapons drawn, ordering the occupants to at once exit the vehicle. The driver complied and handed over his credentials. He identified himself as Yusuf Hamza, a Pakistani national and CIA asset, claiming he was on a diplomatic assignment, transporting a VIP from Miami International to Miami Regional Airport. He said that he, his vehicle, and any passengers had full diplomatic immunity against searches, seizures, and arrests.


“Immunity revoked,” the SF commander purportedly told him.

When Cheney refused to exit the vehicle, SF lowered the plexiglass partition separating the driver and passenger compartments and held a pistol directly to his forehead.

“Cheney eventually got out, but not before giving the usual Deep State spiel: ‘Do you know who I am? I own you. Your lives are over.’ That sort of hype. Then he said he was just trying to get to Virginia to see his family for Christmas. Probably not the Christmas he wanted. One thing’s for sure, he’ll be spending New Year’s at Guantanamo Bay,” our source said.


Both Cheney and Hamza have been taken to a detention center for processing, our source said in closing.




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